I spent some hours of Saturday in silence. I was going to sleep in but couldn’t, so I meditated a bit longer than usual. I meditated alone that day and it was very peaceful and I promised myself I would allow that peace to continue throughout the day.
I had worked my hours for the week and this was my day off, but I wanted to do something in silence where I could meditate in activity. I chose this day to go back to digging my trench. It’s been out there calling me, but there have been other projects I needed to do first. Since this was my day off, I gave myself permission to do as I pleased. It’s been raining often so the ground is fairly soft (it’s a heavy soil mostly made of red clay and some sand and rocks, when the rain comes it’s softer for a few days and then it dries out again and it’s almost like concrete and seems fairly impossible to dig) and the sun was just starting to shine through the thinning clouds.
As I prepared my tools and looked at my work I had the thought that anyone else might think I was out of my mind, but I couldn’t wait to begin. I had been silently chanting since my meditation and I continued for hours as I worked in the soil. It is hard work for the body. Different parts of my body were complaining, but I pushed on at a steady pace. I was sweating a good amount and it felt refreshing to do so.
When it came time to take lunch inside, I was ready to rest and eat. I decided to eat at a table set aside for people who want to be silent. I quietly began to eat my meal and I listened to random thoughts in my mind as they attempted to disturb my peace. I didn’t give in them and just sat quietly eating my meal. I kept my gaze away from people and in time noticed I could feel something inside of me. Something was there. It was quiet, peaceful, joy. It rose up in me and I was deeply blessed. It came again and again and my eyes wanted to weep but I didn’t let them this time. Instead I offered it back to God in prayer and gratitude.
This feeling continued when I went back to digging. I talked with my guru and told him I would dig this ditch for a thousand miles and for the rest of my life if it pleased him. I feel so free in my heart right now. Something is happening to me here. I’m learning what no one could ever teach me in a class or book, or when living in the city. I’m learning something new about me and about my relationship with God.
God Bless You,